We moved.

No longer residents of Lopburi, Thailand… now citizens of greater Bangkok.  And, it’s wonderful.  Seriously wonderful.  I honestly can’t begin to describe to all of you just how spectacular and refreshing this change of location, change of home, change of lifestyle has been for the two of us.  It is nothing short of a blessing, and that’s really the best way to put it.  After all of the struggles with noise, dirt, mold, allergies, lack of basic conveniences (a flushing toilet, for example), health problems, stress, unfriendly (and rather scary) street, living beside people who wanted absolutely nothing to do with us, etc……. we are now living in a whole new world.

I feel normal again.  Well, as normal as is possible being an American girl living in Thailand, of course.  But really, after living in the country for a year, it does feel normal.  I sometimes wonder now how weird it will feel the first time we return to the States.  Hmmm.

In front of our new house, before going out on my birthday.

Anyways, since I don’t have a bunch of pics ready to post online yet (since we just got our internet hooked up in the last day or so), I figured I’d just list off a few of the things I’m really thankful for in our new home.  It’s true, I’m no longer calling where we live our “house”… no, this place is worthy of being called our home.

• 2 real, self-flushing toilets (yes, we have 2!)
• a bathtub (a rare find in Thailand)
• a separate shower area upstairs
• a patio behind the house where I can do laundry and cook
• an automatic washing machine, with a big metal rack to dry clothes in the sunshine
• my own oven/stove (outside to keep the house cooler)
• a corner lot that actually has a little bit of yard
• a couch to sit on
• trees!
• windows on every single wall (we only had one in Lopburi)
• complete floors in every room (meaning no broken tiles, no missing chunks of wood)
• space for visitors (hint, hint!)
• a corner lot that enable us to be quite visible to neighbors, giving us the opportunity to make friends
• lots of neighbors that are willing to talk to us
• loudspeakers that broadcast weekly community announcements, which are always preceded by 5 minutes of 1940′s swanky night club style music, then closed out with more music that sounds like the end of an old-timey radio show
• birds in our trees
• quietness
• the ability to begin sleeping again
• a functional a/c wall unit in our bedroom and office
• a functional kitchen nook (one wall of our living room) with cabinets and a countertop!
• a gracious, friendly landlord
• no fluorescent tube lighting in the house  :)  (it’s all cans or circle fluorescents)
• a corner lot that happens to be where the kids play after school every day
• a little house-front vegetable stand (that sells flour, too!) in our “village”
• when riding my bike to the vegetable stand, a few people already call to me by name to say hello
• being able to actually hear the crickets at night, rather than booming clubs
• … and so much more!

Now that we’re just about finished with all of the work that goes into setting up a home from nothing (literally, we moved here with clothes, computers, and a few small items), it’s time to get back to language study, meeting new people, and learning just how we can reach out to the community around us.  I can already envision so much good here.  In the past few days, we’ve had 3 women from down the road either walk or ride their bicycles down to chat with us while we did work on our yard.  We’ve had conversations with the older couple who lives across the street, and talked to a lady a few houses down about her plants and what she thinks we should do with our yard.  The kids that play on our street corner finally got up the courage to speak to us and invited Brook to play some badminton, while I brought out fresh chocolate chip cookies to feed them at the beginning of the week… and, they came back this afternoon, rang our bell, and asked if Brook could come out again to play!

Have I mentioned yet how refreshing this change has been?  I’m beyond thankful.

The craziest thing about this – aside from the fact that I can now read and write a completely foreign script, and speak enough Thai to be mostly independent in everyday life, as well as hold my own in general conversation all in a totally new, totally tone-dependent language – is that it means we’ve been living in Thailand just short of a year already.  We arrived in-country July 29th (crazy enough, my dad’s birthday), last year – 2009.

It’s been a year since we’ve been able to hold onto or see either side of our families in person.  It’s been a year since I’ve eaten cottage cheese (I used to eat it like every day).  It’s been a year since I’ve seen a field of corn or soybeans, seen a proper cow, or witnessed a traffic jam in the suburbs of Chicago.  It’s been a year since I’ve experienced an actual change in seasons.

That’s just crazy.

So, what is it that I’ve spent the last year doing?  Studying.  Lots and lots of studying.  Kinda weird, tough, and humbling to go from being the one teaching others for a few years back to being a student.  And, even at that, being like a pre-schooler.  During the course of my studies at the center here in Lopburi, I’ve gone through 9 learning modules:

• 1-3 : basic survival Thai (numbers, colors, days of the week, etc.) written in English phonetics.
• 4 : the writing module, where I learned to read and write the Thai script (because all modules after #4 are completely written in Thai!).
• 5 : how to carry out certain daily life tasks, with sample conversations on ordering a gas tank, reserving a hotel room, both giving and asking for directions, etc.
• 6 : Thai family structure, as well as cultural norms and traditions and how they’ve changed through the generations.
• 7 : easy Gospels unit where I studied 3 Bible storybooks which contained each of Jesus’ parables.
• 8 : self-study/ module out – I learned about kitchen terminology and Thai food with a woman from our community instead of a teacher at the school.
• 9 : Christian communications – learning how to use the high royal/religious vocabulary set for prayers, opening/closing church services, how to both read and explain passages from the Bible, how to tell stories for children (I drew the picture cards below to help me tell the Creation story during my exam), tell my own testimony, and explain why I came to Thailand.

I know there's no Day 7 card - I don't know what God looks like, so I obviously couldn't draw him resting!

After every module, every student has what we call a “check” – a one-hour oral exam with a teacher other than your own, and a language advisor writing down their evaluations as you speak.  Yesterday (Wednesday), I had my final check – Module 9.  It was crazy knowing this would be my last one while in residence at Lopburi.  It went alright, despite the fact that I’d not been able to sleep more than a total of 2.5 hours in the last couple of days, nor was I able to study as a result of some pretty crazy neighbors and their noise.  I guess that means I’ve truly learned the language, right?  If I can still speak it well enough to be understood and pass my exam, while unable to see straight, without studying, and feeling a massive beating headache… I’d say my progress is just dandy.  Yep.

After my final module check, then it was time for the big humdinger – the Year One exam.  Dun dun duuun.  Surprisingly, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be!  I can’t really give you any details on what it was, or how it was carried out on here though.  The Year One exam needs to be kept secret so every student has an equal chance at displaying their true skill level.  I will tell you though, that it was comprised of both an oral exam and a one-hour writing session.  I actually thought they were both kind of fun.  Yeah, I just said an exam was fun.  And, you’ll just have to take my word for it, since I can’t tell you what I did!  In all seriousness, part of the fun came from the fact that I felt like I’d truly accomplished something.

Halfway through Mod 9 - is my handwriting neat enough?

Brook doesn’t have his last set of exams (same ones I did) until next Wednesday, the 7th.  So, what am I doing in the meantime?  Packing, chilling, and doing lots of cleaning.  Why?  Because now that we’re finished, we finally get to move out of Lopburi and get our lives started!  But, I’m not going to tell you any more about that yet… you have to wait at least another week until we move, and hopefully get the internet all hooked up at our new house.  :)  All I’m sayin’ is we’re headed to Bangkok, and I love the house.

Just after I was born.

With Father’s Day this weekend, of course I’ve been thinking about my dad again.  He’s not here for me to hug anymore.  Not here for me to say “Happy Father’s Day” to.  Not around for me to bake a cake or grill up some hamburgers for.  This is the 10th one since he’s been gone.  Kinda crazy to think about.

.

So, in remembering my dad today, it made me think about this past April (the 20th being the 10 year anniversary of his death), and some of the realizations I came to that, frankly, I never saw before.  It was too hard for me to write about it then, so that’s why I waited until now.  Perhaps this is something you’ve already discovered, something you made the connection to a long time ago… or maybe you haven’t.  Either way, I want to share it with you because it’s become really important to me.

How many of you out there are either Christians yourselves or have observed Christian practices in a church or elsewhere?  You are probably familiar with the concept of Communion then, right?  Though it is practiced differently in some churches and religious circles, the premise remains the same: it is done in remembrance of Jesus Christ and the sacrifice which He made for us, with His own life, in payment for our sin.  We eat a piece of bread (cracker, wafer, etc.) and taste the wine (grape juice, etc.) as we think about this sacrifice and make a connection to Him yet again.  This is all done in reverence and with love.  (Or at least it should be.)

Every year, on the anniversary of my Dad’s death (April 20) and his birthday (July 29), I eat a special meal and I think about him.  He was sick for my entire memorable life (he came ill when I was still very small), and though I didn’t get to know him as well as I wish I could have, there were times when he was able to outshine the disease that held him captive – and it’s those memories that I hold onto.  One thing I remember enjoying with him was egg salad sandwiches.  My mom also tells me that when she and him were dating, he also liked to have Lime Jell-O with pears in it and make the meal a picnic.  So, what is it that I eat for lunch and/or dinner now on these special days?  You got it – egg salad sandwiches, and Jell-O (though not as easy to find now in Thailand).

It really is important to me to do this, as it helps me feel some sort of connection to the father that’s no longer here with me.  It gives me the chance to think about him (not that I don’t already, most every day), and bring back his memory in a tangible way.  It reminds me of the love I had for him while he was around, lets me think about the struggles he had to overcome with his health all those years, and allows me to miss him in a non-depressing sort of way.  I do everything I can to make sure it happens every year, and I look forward to it.

It wasn’t until standing in church at the end of April (this year), not long after having my traditional meal a week or two before, that I finally had a sort of epiphany, if you will…  you see, I’ve always taken and understood Communion, but this time I connected with it in a different way.  After all, how was this bread and juice, mixed with Scripture readings and prayer, any different from what I do for my own Dad 2 times a year?  It’s taking something we have, and using it to remember someone we love in a tangible way – the same way every single time, and on a regular basis.  I don’t know if I make any sense to anyone other than myself on this, but all I know is that I feel like I understand the meaning behind this practice in church a little bit better, and I think it hits just a little bit deeper for me now.  What I don’t understand is why I’ve never made this connection before now… maybe the timing was meant for me to be in Thailand, separated from everyone else I know, before I could really understand what everything is all about.

I duno… just thinkin’.

** Oh, and the title picture for this post on the main page is actually a picture my Dad took of himself taking a picture, in a mirror.  :) **

Now, to the rest of you, to whom I may sound like just another a blabbering girly girl hyped up over something insignificant, I say “whatever.”  With the kindest smile, of course.  :)

Today, Brook and I had a few hours to kill between lessons and decided our time would be best spent checking out a new store on the other end of town.  It just opened on Wednesday, and we decided (after the last Grand Opening we tried to attend) it would be better to wait a few days until the curious crowd died down a little bit.  Even better, we decided midday would cut down on the masses even more.  Yes, this plan worked, and off we went to check out this place called Makro just outside of the city.

Makro, for those of you who don’t know, is a more simplified Thai equivalent to Sam’s Club.  They sell many items in bulk (cooking oils, snacks, some fresh produce, etc.) at a discounted price, and shoppers are asked to have a membership card.  This week, they’re letting people in without a card though, so they can start shopping and get hooked on it first.  Ha.  I’ve heard about these stores, and driven by them many times during the course of the past year, but had never been inside one.

I was in sheer awe of their produce section and frozen items, the dairy case (yes, there was a dairy case!!!!!) and the bakery.  I don’t expect any of you to understand, but after living in our city for a year, lacking many food items that I’ve been accustomed to having for the past 25 years, this place about made me cry.  Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love Thai food!  But, it’s nice to have something more familiar every once in a while, ya know?

So, what did I see that I haven’t seen before (well, sometimes in Bangkok, but not in Lopburi)??  Massive blocks of cheese (one mozzarella, one white cheddar, one yellow Australian cheddar, one gouda and one parmesean)!  Real sour cream!  Ground beef, frozen pizza dough, yellow corn tortillas, dried bay leaves, Canadian bacon in chunk form, Prego spaghetti sauce, both black and green canned olives, lasagna noodles, Granny Smith apples, balsamic vinegar, real navel oranges, fresh strawberries, lemons (very rare), real sweet corn, frozen blueberries (berries are pretty non-existent here), frozen spinach (oh my goodness!), and both red & white wine vinegars.  It took most of the power I have within me to resist grabbing some of everything and shoving it in my cart as we walked the store (though it did help reminding myself that it was all a bit expensive on our Thai budget, and these sort of things would have to limited to an infrequent “treats” basis.  Ha!).  I simply could not believe my eyes.

But the biggest thing to me, the thing that made my eyes well up with tears for some inexplicable reason, was celery.  Real, fat, bright green, large bunched, crispy, refreshing, glorious celery.  I have been wanting for this simple pleasure for a year now – chicken salad just isn’t the same, egg salad lacks that fabulous crunch, peanut butter is lonely without it… and today I found it.  I’m not kidding about how happy I was to pick it up, see the stamp from California, and take it to be weighed.  And it wasn’t too expensive either!  Only about $1.00 US for a good sized bunch.  I was like a little kid proudly carrying a new toy around throughout the store. I just couldn’t stop smiling.

I know, I know.  I’m a silly girl.  But, it’s those little things in life that help refresh this girl when day to day life in Thailand gets to be just a little bit too much.  That celery made my day.  I ate a few sticks with peanut butter for lunch, and I made the most delightful chicken salad for supper.  It was wonderful.

What’s one of your “little things” that can cheer you up or make everything all better?

It’s been a bit of a struggle for us living here in Lopburi, but we’ve done our best to really focus on the pros – the victories and positive things – in our thoughts, blogs, and everyday conversations.  There is only a small group with whom we discuss the cons.  I think it’s better that way, ya know?  With this system, we are able to vent, share our frustrations, and receive advice from those closest to us while being motivated to continually look for the blessings in each to day to share with the rest.  God has blessed us so richly with the ability to deal with and adapt to our constantly changing lifestyle, and for that I am really thankful.  I much prefer living my life on the bright side.  Wouldn’t you agree?  After all, we’ve got a roof over our heads, food on the table, and are physically able to get out of bed everyday and take care of ourselves.

That being said, we’ve received questions from friends lately about what it is that we miss from home (aside from goodies that they want to send us from the States – yeah, for that!).  It’s kinda weird how random things just kind of pop up in my mind when I least expect it.  Seriously, I can be walking down the street in 100 degree heat and blazing sun, headed to buy a bag of tomatoes in the market, and suddenly I’ll see a kid with a fancy looking notebook and start thinking about Hobby Lobby and all of the crafts I used to make for our home with supplies from that store.  Ha!

So, what is it that I miss from home?  Well, besides the obvious – family & friends, holidays together – here’s a little bit of what’s come across my mind in the past several months.  My intent here is not to depress you or make anyone feel bad for us, rather I hope it might help bring you joy as you seek to appreciate these things in your own life, as well as give you an idea of just how different the way of life is on our side of the world.  And hey, maybe the next time you enjoy one of these, you’ll think of us and say a quick prayer.  That would be awesome.

So, here we go, in absolutely no particular order at all.  I’m typing as I’m thinking….

• Distinct seasons – we have hot, hotter, super hot, and wet hot.  Our coolest season is equivalent to a Midwestern summer.  The sun is also, according to my own highly scientific analysis, roughly 150 times larger and closer to us over here.  :)
• Carpet.
• Grocery stores (when available) laid out in what I would consider a logical manner.
• A real toilet that does not require a bucket & bowl to flush.
• Furniture – you know, like a couch or an armchair.
• Gardening.
• Quietness.
• Windows – yeah, we’re in a middle unit rowhouse with one small window set downstairs, and one window upstairs.
• A cool wind / breeze – Lopburi is often referred to as the “city where the wind doesn’t blow.”
• A kitchen.
• Water you can use from the tap.
• Grounded electricity.
• Being able to speak with the people around me without practicing everything in my head 10 times before saying it.
• Not being stared at everywhere I go.
• Hearing crickets at night and birds in the morning – we live in a “concrete jungle.”
• Listening to rustling leaves – no trees anywhere near our house, and not that many in our city either.
• A roof that completely covers the house.
• Cleanliness.
• Not being sweaty all the time – TMI?  Hahaha.
• Knowing where to go & what to do naturally.
• Washing machine.
• Blankets.
• My old pup, Lily.
• Having a car.
• Shoes that aren’t flip-flops.  (Although I do absolutely LOVE being barefoot/wearing sandals all the time, I do miss wearing some nice ballet flats or occasional heels.)
• Cheese & bagels.
• Radishes & spinach.
• Smelling good.
• A real shower and/or bathtub – we have a hand shower on the wall next to our “toilet.”  Haha.
• Cold weather.
• Scented candles, in the evening, with a cool breeze bringing the smell of Fall in through the windows.
• Having barbecues.
• Grilling food.
• Incandescent light bulbs.
• Grass/ lawns.
• Insect control – the ants here do not march two by two, they come in full armies.  :)
• A piano close by.
• Singing at 628 or in the band on Sunday mornings.
• Speaking English.
• Having a “home” to settle into – this is our second housing already, and we will move again in July.
• Current events – what movies are out, new music, what’s going on in people’s lives, news in the States.
• Brook’s old man slippers.
• Water temperature control.
• Getting dressed up nicely & doing my hair – it’s not worth it in the heat here, as you get gross within 5 minutes.  Ha.

… and the list goes on.

Life in another country really is a whole new ballgame, that’s for sure.  Everything that was once familiar is gone, and it’s like learning how to live all over again.  It truly is an adventure every single day.  And we are blessed.  Each time I think about something  miss from home, it gives me the opportunity to relive the memories that I’ve made in those places, doing those things, the people that I was with.  That’s a huge comfort.  Even when times are rough, I have good things to look back on, and the hope that all will continue to work itself out in the end.

Perhaps next week, I’ll fill you in on some of the things I believe I’ll miss from Thailand when we get to come back to the States for the first time.

Things aren’t always what they seem!

By residing in a foreign country, I’ve willingly subjected myself to living every single day not fully understanding or knowing what’s going on around me.  No, I’m not saying I’ve become an airhead or unaware of myself or anything – rather, I am not in a place where I happen to know what people mean by the things they say or do all of the time anymore.  For example – back in the States, if someone smiles at me, I can take it as a simple gesture of friendliness or goodwill.  However, in some third world countries, if a smile is exchanged between a male and a female, it can be seen as a proposal of marriage.  Glad I don’t live in one of those places, because, well, smiling’s my favorite!

When leaving your home country, your home culture, and the way you have always known things to be, it is super easy to criticize your new location.  Maybe you think that the people don’t drive the right way, cook the right way, aren’t polite enough, are too polite, the people are inherent liars, they let their children run too freely, and goodness, don’t they know you’re supposed to bathe every day???  It’s easy to notice things that are different and judge from the get-go…

However, if you ever want to last in your new home… if you ever want to get to know any of your neighbors… if you ever want to enjoy your life again… you need to start asking the question “why” – sincerely! – before letting your initial judgments get too firm.  I’ve had to learn this living in Thailand.  I’m not saying I always remember it, but I do try, and it does make life just that much more bearable on the rough days.  By trying to understand where somebody else is coming from, why they do or say what they do, and what lies behind it, we can learn so much from the people around us!

I used to think it was so silly that, here in Thailand, it’s pretty rare to find paper or cloth napkins of the size you would be used to seeing in a restaurant back in the States.  Instead, there are tiny, 1-ply pink tissues that are, when unfolded, only about a 3 inch square.  How wasteful to use so many little tissues when one large one would serve me much better, right?  How NOT useful when trying to dab the sweat running down my face from eating chilies so hot I feel like my throat will be no longer of use to me, right?  So frustrating.  But, when I asked a Thai friend about this apparent lack of care for cleanliness in Thai culture, I learned that I was actually the one considered unclean and unpractical.  What?!  According to the Thais, it is much more sanitary to use one tissue to wipe your mouth, another to wipe off your utensils before use, another to clean up the pool of condensation under your cup, and another to dab the sweat from your brow.  After all, who would want to use one large paper or cloth napkin to do all of those things.  According to my Thai friends, that would be gross.  Would I have ever assumed that explanation on my own?  Doubt it.  Thus, the reason I must live my new life in a constant state of learning, a constant state of asking “why?”

This not only goes for those of us who have chosen to live overseas, but it’s the same for those of you back in the States, too.  The next time you see a mom who doesn’t seem to be in control of her screaming child at the grocery store, stop a second and think about the possibility that she could be trying to teach her child that he can’t always get what he wants.  She may just be holding to her word and trying to mold her children into responsible future adults.  The next time you see someone who isn’t the most attractive or able-bodied seeming to fumble their way through a department store, don’t laugh or poke fun.  Appreciate the fact that this person is doing their best to take care of themselves, may have had a harder life than you could ever imagine, and offer them a smile or some help.  I know we’ve all heard it before “you can’t judge a book by its cover,” and it really is true.

The next time somebody looks different, acts or speaks differently, or does something in a way completely opposite to you, don’t always assume that your way of thinking or being is better – take the time to watch and listen first.  You never know what you just may learn!

Every day I wonder what it’s like where you are now.  If it’s all angels and clouds, with singing all around, like the movies tell us… if you’re sitting in a fishing boat somewhere chatting it up with Moses, drinking root beer, and eating an ice cream bucket full of chocolate chip cookies (yes, I DID see you sneak those growing up)… if you’re simply kneeling before God in complete and utter awe of Him, like they tell us in church.  Who knows.  I guess I won’t know until I get to that point, too, huh.  Can you walk again?  Can you see?  Do you remember us back here, or would that be too painful?  I’m not sure how all that works up there.

It’s incredible to think that just a couple of days ago marked 10 years that you’ve been gone.  A lot has happened since you left, ya know.  I turned 16 and started driving, and I even joined the soccer team at school.  Yeah, me.  Soccer.  Crazy, huh?  I made it to State twice for singing, and I even got to sing the National Anthem at a big basketball game.  Wish you could have been there to hear it.  I worked really hard in school, just like you always told me to do, and I got enough scholarships to help me get into a really good school in Indiana.  I kept playing soccer for my first year there before having to drop it so I could do more volunteer work at church.  You would have come to cheer me on, right?  When I got to HU, I started out in Youth Ministry (yeah, I got the same bug you had… every time there was something to do, or a mission trip to go on, I was right there!), but eventually changed that to Missions, in my second year, after spending some time in West Africa.  (Yeah, I went to Africa!)  After going to another country on my own for a few months, again in West Africa, I decided God was calling me into missions just like you, Dad.  And guess what?  Now, I’m a full-blown missionary in Thailand.  Can you believe it?

At Huntington, I met a guy I think you would like… His name is Brook.  Well, it’s really Michael, but he goes by Brook.  Confusing, I know.  We got married a few weeks after graduation in 2006.  Tim walked me down the aisle, and he held my hand on his arm the whole way.  I know he knew it should have been you holding my arm that day, too… but, we got through it alright.  Tim’s a great big brother.  You know how we used to set traps for each other in the house and argue and all that when we were little?  Well, there’s no more of that now.  We really did grow up to love each other, just like you said we would!  Haha.  He’s married now, too.  And he’s got 2 of the cutest kids in the world.  I’m so glad you got to meet his wife, Marie, before you left… she’s become such a big part of our family, it’s hard to imagine it without her now. I only wish you would have had the chance to meet Brook, too.  It’s hard for me knowing that he’s never met you.  It’s hard to know that you’ll never know our children, that they’ll never really know you.  Heck, I didn’t even really get to know you that well because of that terrible disease… if only I could go back and ask you more…

I wonder what it is that you think of me now.  I wonder if you’d come to visit Brook & I now that we live in Thailand… if you’d enjoy seeing Southeast Asia, if you would throw buckets of water during Songkraan, if you would make mom eat the fried bugs in the open-air market.  I wonder what would be the same and what would be different if you were either still around in the nursing home, or if you hadn’t even gotten so sick in the first place.  I know I was young and didn’t fully understand it all, it was all I’d ever known.  But, if I could go back and do it over again, I would ask you so many more questions, so many more things about who you were and what you were like when you were growing up, I would cherish the time we had in your room at the nursing home instead of wondering when I’d get to go back and do my homework for school.  It makes me sad to know that I’ll never have that chance again, to know you as well as I could have.  I’m sorry I wasted what we had… I didn’t realize how precious it was at the time.

I really miss you, Dad.  There’s days when the ins and outs of living here make me wish I could just crawl up in my Daddy’s lap and cry.  But you’re not here.  Mom’s been there for me, though.  You’d be really proud of her and who she has become.  I know I can’t wish you back into the life of pain and the years of suffering you had to go through again, but if I could have you back for just one day…

Love you, Daddy.

But, we had no keys. No post office keys means no mail.

Here’s the deal – I hadn’t bothered to look for our keys over the past several days, because I knew we wouldn’t be able to get to where we would use them. Today, upon looking in their usual keeping-space, I remembered that I loaned them out to a fellow student at our language school (we all share one PO box). I remember exactly where I was sitting, what I was wearing, even the conversation I was having with another person at the time that I so graciously volunteered our keys to a person who needed to run to the post office. The only thing I DON’T remember is who I actually lent them to! Blargh. So, after running around in the hot midday sun, we had no mail, no packages, and no fun.

Next up was a trip to Big C for a few essentials. We ate lunch at KFC as a treat, and sadly, the fries tasted like they’d been made 2 weeks ago, then put in the refrigerator. Blech. After finishing our lunch, then heading into the store, I realized the a/c must not have been functioning properly, as I began sweating like crazy, along with the other tons of people in the aisles (which was surprising, being the middle of the day on a Monday). But, then it happened. The one thing that made the day all better, despite the tiredness, despite the heat, despite the headache I already had from not sleeping again last night…

A little girl sheepishly said “hello.”

Upon my hearing this and turning to see her, she hid her face and giggled. I turned back away from her, looked only out of the corner of my eye, and out of the side of my mouth whispered back “hello” as I continued to browse the sale bucket of Thai printed fabrics and whatnot. About a minute later, she said it again with more confidence, so I replied and smiled back at her. Again, more giggles. Just before I was about to move on, she came up to me (with 2 other little ones now looking on) and said “my name is” with a huge smile. I figured she was trying to ask my name, but only knew a couple of phrases in English. So, what did I do? I spoke back to her in Thai, told her my name, and then asked hers. She couldn’t believe it. A farang (white-skinned foreigner) not only spoke to her kindly, but spoke in Thai! More giggles of course. I told her I was pleased to meet her, then she went back to the cart to wait for who I assume was her mother.

A few minutes later, I hear a pitter-patter of flip flops coming up behind me in the shoes section where we were looking for flip-flops big enough to fit Brook (Thais generally have tiny feet, so we have trouble finding shoes in this country), as his current ones are nearing the end of their life. I turned around to see the same little girl, this time holding the hand of another girl younger than herself. She told me the other girl wanted to meet me, too. I spoke a few sentences before they giggled again, and ran away. The same scenario happened a few more times as we went through the store, with each time meeting another of the young girl’s friends. One of them was even excited as she was also named Sara. Sweet kids.

The best part was the last time they came and found me, over in the noodle aisle, (there were 5 of them together at this point) and the girl said she had one more person who wanted to nae nam (introduce herself) to me, and find out if I lived in this city or not. After we spoke another minute or two, they all got really shy as the oldest one said naa rak cang lery, which means “I love your face,” and they said they had to go. As they went their way and I went mine, each time they saw me down at the end of another aisle, they all smiled and said, “Phii Sara” (phii means older sister in Thai). That was awesome.  I couldn’t help but continue smiling as we finished up and walked out of the store.

This is why learning the language of whatever host culture you live in is so important. Language helps you to connect with the people you are living with. Language helps you to communicate, even if it is only your name and that you do, in fact, live in this city and are not a tourist. I can imagine how excited the girls will be to tell their parents and friends that they spoke to a real, live farang today. (I know how happy I am to tell you guys about this, and I’m an adult!) Being able to understand, and be understood, no matter how difficult it is, is a victory. This same sort of scenario happened a couple of weeks ago, as I met and spoke with another group of curious young girls at a small shop two days in a row.  It’s intimidating for sure, but really fun.  I like meeting new people, but especially kids. And, to now feel like I’m starting to get my ability to connect with them back… well, that’s a really good feeling.

It’s the little things like saying hello that really make my day.

“We are complex animals living complex lives in which we are not always able to cope with the difficulties that we face. As a result, we are subject to feelings of tension and stress, for example the cognitive dissonance and potential shame of doing something outside our values. To handle this discomfort we use various coping methods.”

Some ways of dealing with stress are better than others, of course.  Some can be downright destructive.  But others, they can be so good.  How is it that you deal with new situations, things you think you can’t handle, days that just seem to be no good?  I know what I like to do – cook.  I like to do pretty much anything with my hands, really.  Painting, crafting, drawing, coloring (yes, in coloring books.  Go ahead and laugh if you must.), decorating, gardening… but, oh how I love to cook.  And yes, I count baked goods right along in there when I use the word “cook.”

There’s just something about being able to create something new, beautiful (hopefully!), and delicious out of a bunch of other stuff that may not always be together.  Then, being able to supply someone else with a treat that will help nourish their body, fill them up, and perhaps give them a bit of joy as well – what could be better?

I finally got to see Julie & Julia one afternoon this week when all I felt like doing was laying in the dark – I had a headache and had finished my classes for the day already, so why not.  Several of my friends have said that mere minutes into this film, they all thought of me.  I thought that was sweet and wonderful, and now that I’ve seen it myself, I know this movie most certainly had to have been made for me.  Nearly everything that either the characters of Julie or Julia said resounded with me in such a way that I actually spent a good deal of the movie teary-eyed.

Very much like the situation I currently find myself in, both women were moved around and transplanted from what they knew, often had a terrible kitchen and no space to work with, dealt with feelings of insufficiency, felt the desire to do something more with their lives outside of the 9 to 5 day, wanted to somehow enrich the lives of others, and they both had husbands who loved to eat.  They both took comfort in knowing that when they were in the kitchen, they had to power to create something good, something useful, maybe even something great.

Perhaps my favorite line of the movie occurs only 8 minutes in, when after a rough day at work, Julie sees a chocolate window display on her walk home.  Instantly upon seeing this, she says to herself “mm… chocolate cream pie” and the movie cuts to her preparing such a treat in her tiny apartment kitchen.  In telling her husband about her mess of a day, she says:

“You know what I love about cooking?  I love that after a day when nothing is sure – and when I say nothing, I mean nothing… you can come home and absolutely know that if you add egg yolks to chocolate and sugar and milk, it will get thick.  It’s such a comfort.”

Exactly.  When all else goes awry, you know that there is still something you can do, something you can create, that will always turn out the same.  You all know already how much I love the kitchen.  It’s in the blood passed on to me from a long line of women who not only can, but enjoy being able to cook.  (Yep, thanks Mom, Aunt Lori, Nana, Nanny, Gram…)  When moving overseas, I thought that would be the one thing, the one piece of myself, that I would be able to successfully transplant no matter where I would be.  Nothing could change that, right?  Well, kinda.

We’ve been here for 8 months now, and it seems that just now I am getting my groove back.  Back in the States, I could whip up a party menu, prepare it all myself, and serve a group of people with no problem.  It was easy, fun, and ever so enjoyable.  I could buy whatever I needed, my home had a controllable climate and windows to keep out the dust, and I had the space to do the work that I needed to do.  Here in Thailand, I have a tiny space with only an oven and a sink, no control over the heat and humidity in my house, and a market severely lacking in much of the ingredients and utensils that I am used to.  Without knowing how to adapt from the get-go, I felt that I’d really lost a big piece of my identity, a big piece of who I am.  And, that doesn’t feel good when you already know that nothing else is the same either.

Lately, I’ve been getting it back though.  I’ve spent the past several months experimenting and researching recipes (and sometimes, just plain winging it!) for meals that I can adapt to what is available to me here in our small city.  I’ve had to learn how to make recipes that “require” a food processor, mixer, or blender with one bowl, a spatula, and a hand-held pastry blending tool.  It’s almost as though I’ve had to learn how to cook all over again… and, I think I’ve finally got it.  It’s wonderful to feel that I’m getting a little bit of myself back as I continue to learn how to adapt to my surroundings, not only in Thailand of course, but also in the kitchen.  It makes me happy when, after eating, the Mr. says to “put this in the make-again pile.”

All emotions and whatever else aside, I do love the movie Julie & Julia.  Growing up, I often spent my Saturday mornings watching Julia Child, along with Yan Can Cook, Burt Wolf, and the Frugal Gourmet, all on PBS.  No cartoons for me, no, I wanted to learn how to cook.  I was amazed when Julia could make a beautiful cake or sauce, was in complete awe when Martin Yan would throw a dry block of cellophane noodles into a pan and they would puff up instantly, loved travelling with Burt all around the world discovering new cuisines, and learning simple meals from Jeff on FG.  It was really neat to be able to see a little more into the life of one of these chefs, and see just how she came to be known as she is.

Someday, even if I’m 80 years old, I will go to culinary school.  It’s been a dream of mine since I was little.  :)

L to R: Mom, Papa, Tim, Aunt Lori

We’ve been in Singapore for the past month, taking care of business at the international headquarters for our organization (which is why you’ve not been getting posts out of me), and yesterday morning, before heading to the airport for our flight back to Thailand, we had a Skype date to take care of.

Now, this wasn’t just any old Skype call.  No, this was a gathering of my whole family, all in one place, all at one time.  It was time for the annual Spring birthdays party (big brother, Tim-Feb 27; niece, Madelynn-March 1; cousin, Kristen-March 3), and everybody was at my Aunt’s house.  Since she’s the only one out of the bunch with a high-speed connection and the computer capabilities for video chat, it seemed the perfect opportunity to see everybody.  And, boy was it perfect.

A few months ago, you may remember me writing about talking with my Aunt, Uncle, and cousin for the first time online.  It was wonderful.  This time, I got to see not only them, but also my Mom, my brother and his whole family, my grandparents, my other cousin and her husband, all together… for the first time in 7.5 months.  Has it really been that long already?  It sure has.  We talked for just over an hour, sharing about the weather, what time of day it was, what’s been going on in each of our lives… my 6 year old nephew, Carson, played a song for us on the piano, and my 3 year old niece, Madelynn, sang “Pants on the Ground,” then tried to throw some popcorn to us through the laptop screen!

Of course we all got a tiny bit teary when the video screen just popped up – it was just so unbelievable.  I mean really, to be chatting live, face-to-face, from Illinois to Singapore for free is just ridiculous.  It’s like living with the Jetsons!  I know it meant a lot to my mom to be able to actually see us when we talked, different from our regular chats every few weeks on the phone.  Crazy to think when she and my dad were missionaries 30 years ago, it was a huge thing for them to just make a phone call every month or so back to their families.  I wonder if my dad would even believe the technology that’s come around since he’s been gone.  Hmm.

Well, that’s all I wanted to say.  I love my family.  I’m thankful for them.  And, I’m thankful for Skype.  :)